Tips on Finding Your Unique Writing Voice

All jeans are not made alike. You have bootcut, flared bottom, low riders, jeans with Lycra and Spandex, and old fashioned Levis. Most people have a favorite style, I know that I do.

That's the way it is with writers, as well--we're all different with very different voices. And, that's a good thing. There's no one size fits all in jeans, writers or readers for that matter. We like what we like. We write what resonates with us. We should write what we know or are interested in learning more about.

What does voice mean in writing and how does a writer find his or her own unique writing voice? When I wrote my first novel-length manuscript, A Decent Woman, I just wrote it. I didn't know what voice was other than I knew I sang bass in school and badly at that. I didn't know about branding or building a platform and I'm kinda glad I didn't. I might have been overwhelmed! Here are a few tips that worked for me.

READ, READ, READ.
Think about why you like to read what you read.
What genres appeal to you and why?
Examine why you like a particular author. Is it the story content, the style of writing or the book's settings and locales?
JOURNAL, JOURNAL, JOURNAL.
Get to know yourself through your blog or journal.
How would you describe yourself in a couple of words?
What did you like to do or read as a kid?

I was born in Santurce, Puerto Rico to a Puerto Rican mother and an American service member (yes, there's a difference, although we are American citizens). I was brought up in a bilingual family. I'd always had a love of classic Puerto Rican literature like La Charca by Manuel Zeno Gandia (considered by many to be the first Puerto Rican novel) and Dr. Manuel A. Alonso who write El Gibaro. My Puerto Rican grandparents owned two farms in Puerto Rico which I LOVED visiting. I also loved my Spanish classes and my yearly summer vacations on the island with my family. My Polish grandmother and my Puerto Rican grandmothers were great storytellers and I was a great listener. I am very family-oriented and at one time, I researched my family tree on both sides of my family--Polish, Russian, Italian, Canarian (Canary Island) and Puerto Rican. I love great adventure and reading about great adventures, the ocean, the Caribbean islands, history, historical fiction, and family sagas. I love crime drama, am a bit of a feminist, and always thought little girls needed a heroine. As a child, I loved to talk, draw and write stories and songs. As an adult, I worked as a bilingual social worker, a counselor and an alternative medicine practitioner. My sister and I love extreme weather.

Is it coming together for you? It was no big surprise that I would write an historical novel/family saga set in Puerto Rico in the early 1900's, based on my grandmother's lifelong friendship with her midwife. My protagonist Ana was a strong woman, an advocate for women's rights, a mystical and spiritual woman, who explored the idea of decency in early Puerto Rican society. The extreme weather aspect? My first chapter opens during a hurricane. Hurricanes and tropical storms are a way of life on the islands :)

I hope my tips help you explore and find your writing voice and, if not?
Just WRITE! Figure out your voice later. Your unique writing voice will come through writing, reading and writing some more. Good luck!

Peace and love,
Ellie

My Novel Is About...

Today is Pierre's first birthday and so far, he has spent the morning napping in a sun beam. Pierre has a great life and so does my Pug, Ozzy. My fur babies make me smile, laugh and sometimes want to pull my hair out, but all in all, they are super awesome company.

There's always a story to tell with those two underfoot or overhead in Pierre's case. I can tell you in detail about how Pierre and I met at the shelter--love at first sight. I can share how great it was watching Pierre meet his older brother Ozzy for the first time by rubbing noses, and I can even tell you about the items and collectibles Pierre has broken in our home as he continues to test his kitty prowess and by sowing his wild oats or catnip.

Perhaps during this morning's nap, Pierre is thanking his nine lives that I rescued him from the SPCA in my town. But most probably he is pretending to be asleep because before this nap, he probably knocked over some valuable in another room that was high on a shelf that I'm unaware of. All that stalking of collectibles, pushing them to the edge, and watching said collectibles drop to the wood floor and/or rug can get tiring and yes, boring. I can tell you a ton of stories about Pierre and Ozzy...

BUT...ASK ME WHAT MY NOVEL,  A DECENT WOMAN, IS ABOUT AND I MIGHT FREEZE.

What's that all about?! I don't know why I instantly freeze and thaw out slowly, and it has happened to me more than once. A person asks me what my novel is about and I stop and think. I'm going to answer you, but I hesitate. Now, I KNOW what my novel is about for goodness sake. I wrote it! All 77,557 words of it! So, why do I hesitate before telling interested people what my novel is about?!

I'm known as the storyteller in my immediate family. I can tell a good story, honest to Betsy. I tell stories from when I was little and I share stories from a simple trip to the hardware store, a walk to the mail box or even about a neighbor I spy from my front yard, for goodness sake. I can tell a great story, but ask me what my first novel is about and I'll begin to tell you, but I seem to fall short.

Why do I find it so difficult to tell you briefly what my novel is about? I've researched my novel and I'm from Puerto Rico, the island where my novel takes places. I'm from Ponce where my characters live! But, I either add way too much detail or I leave out way pertinent information. I begin telling the person what my novel is about and midway through, I add something else or omit something and by the time I finish, the person might have just yawned. The person or people may have smiled at me politely, but the subject has gone from my novel and my spotlight (my Andy Warhol 15 minutes of fame!) to a missed opportunity!

I'm a balance between an introvert and an extrovert, leaning more toward introvert in my older age :) I can tell you a story about stuff that happens external to me, about me, but when it comes to explaining what my novel is about...I flounder. I'll tell you stories about my past, my failures and joys, fears and dreams, but when it comes to my novel that only four people in the world have read from cover to cover--I get nervous.

My query letter is well-written and has been well-received. It is clear, concise and grabs a reader, piquing their interest. But, if you ask me to tell you in three sentences what my novel is about...I flounder and hesitate as to what I should share with you.

So, I've decided to memorize the first paragraph of my query letter which has a great synopsis of my novel. That synopsis says it all.

I'm attending my first writer's conference in NYC in October--

The 2nd Annual Comadres and Compadres Latino Writers Conference, which will take place at Medgar Evers College in Brooklyn, New York on October 5, 2013--

and I'm psyched! I need to have my synopsis down pat by then because there are agents, publishers, writers and authors attending and the list is awesome. http://lascomadres.com/countonme/latino-writers-conference/

I have to be ready to talk about my novel and not be shy about marketing myself!
I have to sell myself and my book to people who don't know me and need to know me!
I have to find a bit more self-confidence so that I can speak eloquently and concisely about myself, my novel and my awesome characters because if I don't, no one else will!

Happy Hump Day to you!

Peace and love,
Ellie

Synopsis and Future Book Cover?

Last week, I was thrilled to be the first guest blogger of The Latina Book Club blog for their Writers Wednesdays - www.latinabookclub.com and as I reread the blog this morning, I realized I forgot to add something very important to my guest blog - the synopsis of my novel, A Decent Woman. Unreal.

I wrote about how I came up with my characters, Ana and Serafina, and although I added a bit at the end about what the novel is loosely about, it doesn't give a reader a sense of the book. I learned the hard way here, folks!

This morning, I offer you the synopsis of my novel as it appears in my query letter to potential agents:

In the male-driven society of 1900 Puerto Rico, women compete against each other for protection, respectability and economic support for themselves and their children. Ana, an Afro-Cuban midwife navigates poverty, racism, machismo and male doctors in a changing medical world. She is known as a “formidable and decent woman”, a caring and experienced midwife, but getting emotionally close to people is both Ana’s strength and vulnerability because of a secret that followed her from Cuba.

My 85,950-word historical novel, A Decent Woman, is the story of the friendship between the midwife Ana and Serafina, a high-spirited young woman who marries into Ponce high society. Despite differences in race and their places in society, the women forge a life-long friendship that will take them to the brink of insanity and the edge of death. Betrayal and resilience are common themes in my protagonist's lives and conflicts arise as the women are forced to look at the idea and definitions of decency that will threaten Ana's old secret as a new secret is born.

Creole in a Red Turban, was painted by Jacques Guillaume Lucien Aman, 1801-1888.  The interesting part to me is that when I began writing my novel in 2006, I described my heroine Ana as wearing a white turban and an off-the-shoulder white blouse. I found the painting on a Google Image search just last week. It's as if the lovely woman was waiting for me to find her and because of her, I'm inspired to paint a portrait of my heroine Ana for my book cover when I'm picked up by an agent and the book is published :) Yes, I can dream!

Ellie

Writers Wednesday at The Latina Book Club!

I took this photograph of my back patio early this morning and I was right - if you don't prepare for a snow storm, it snows! I'd prepared for several winter storm warnings many times this winter and nada. I decided to see if it would happen if I did nothing and it snows. We now have about four inches of snow and it's snowing hard!

I'm so pleased to be the first guest blogger/writer on The Latina Book Club, thank you for your kind invitation, Maria! It's an honor and privilege to write the first blog for Writers Wednesday!  My blog is up this morning, so please go take a look.

http://www.latinabookclub.com

The Latina Book Club's mission is to promote Latina/Latino authors, which we do through book reviews, author interviews, publicity announcements, book of the month selection, etc. A new feature we are adding is 'Writers Wednesdays.' The first Wednesday of each month we will feature a Latina/Latino writer talking about...writing. We welcome published and prepublished writers.

I decided to write about how I came up with the characters of Ana and Serafina in my historical novel, A Decent Woman. My story begins in 1901 in Ponce, Puerto Rico and chronicles the lives of Afro-Cuban midwife Ana Belen and the young socialite Serafina Martinez. The two women who despite the social and racial differences, forge a life-long friendship that will take them to the brink of insanity, the edge of death as Ana wrestles emotionally with her secret.

My link doesn't seem to be working, so please check it out! Could be that the power or my cable is about to go out, so I'd better be brief!

I enjoy keeping up with The Latina Book Club and love that Maria is inviting writers, published and unpublished to write blog posts about the writing life. The writer's life can be quiet and yes, sometimes lonely, so it's wonderful when we can 'meet' new writers and published writers through their blogs.

Stay warm and safe out there! Remember to share body heat when you can :)

Peace and love,
Ellie

The New Year's Eve Conga Line

Happy New Year to you!

I rang in the New Year with my friends and neighbors, Miss Ellie and her husband, at the local VFW which is a club for US veterans of foreign wars.  I had every intention of watching the ball drop at home at home in my jammies with Ozzy and Pierre, my Pug and Maine Coon, and ended up doing the conga line in a LONG line of New Year's Eve conga dancers!  Don't you just love when stuff like that happens?!

Around 3 that afternoon, I remembered that Miss Ellie (I'm known as the Other Ellie on the street since I moved in) had told me about this event a few weeks back.  Why not?  They'd kindly invited me and I'd forgotten!  My father was a vet and so was my ex-husband of 25 years, his father and brother, as well.  I had connections!  Not to mention, plenty of potential conversation starters with vets and their wives as a former Army brat and an ex Army wife.  This could be a fun night and Miss Ellie and her husband are a fun couple!  He's a former Marine and one of the youngest Vietnam vets at the VFW.  A quiet, unassuming guy whose body tells his Vietnam experience with dozens of amazingly amazing tattoos. Why sit alone on New Year's Eve when I could dance the night away with friends, right?

Around 4 pm, I texted Miss Ellie who immediately texted back, "Don't eat dinner and get your butt down here!  LOL!!"  Done!  I jumped in the shower and pondered about what to wear.  What do you wear to a VFW shindig in West Virginia, I wondered.  Sequins, a cocktail dress or jeans?  Since I don't own a single sequin anything, I decided on a shiny black top, my tailored black blazer, black heels and jeans.  Kinda festive, but not New Year's Eve attire to me, so I added great pair of faux diamond hoop earrings.  Done!

The VFW is literally behind my house, so I walked over in my heels, wishing I'd worn flat boots as I gingerly sidestepped the icy patches on the sidewalk. At least I knew I'd be walked home and no one would have to drive!

I pressed the buzzer at the imposing front door and was buzzed in. A private club?  Exclusive to be sure!  The huge bar was decorated with streamers and Christmas lights and several men and a few couples sat on bar stools, nursing drinks.  Mostly men over 60 who smiled when I walked up to the bar, asking for Miss Ellie.  Potential dance partners?!  The friendly bartender (turns out she was a Navy brat) informed me that Miss Ellie was in the kitchen, helping out and that if I decided to stay on to dance, there would be a five dollar cover charge.  Done!  

I wasn't surprised to see Miss Ellie behind the grill as she is a superb chef. As our steaks sizzled on the grill, her husband joined us.  Our evening began with a fantastic New York strip steak, a baked potato with everything on it and a salad in the VFW "diner".  Super dinner!  I'm a red wine devotee and when I was informed that they didn't carry red wine, I opted for scotch and water.  Hadn't had one in over 20 years and the good scotch went down easy :)  With the huge dinner, I knew I wasn't in danger of getting overly tipsy that evening, but I did need to dance off those calories!

And, dance we did!  The DJ was awesome and my hips can you the story of how I danced for about...five hours!  In heels!  I danced with Miss E and her hubby, with two vets and Miss E's hubby, with other women in circles and lines, and in a conga line that went through the VFW, out the door, spilled onto the sidewalk and back into the VFW!  I conga'd with new neighbors in my new town and made new friends.  

It was after the conga line that I remembered my traditional Puerto Rican custom - the glass of water!  I got a glass of water from the bartender and sat it at my table.  At 11:30, we donned shiny cardboard hats and tiaras, got lei'd, and were each given a cardboard horn to blow.  We danced to a couple more songs and at midnight, I ran to throw out my water.  All the negative of 2012 was thrown out the door of my local VFW onto the sidewalk!  Gone!

When I got back to my table, my daughter was calling :)  I could barely hear her over the music, horns and laughter, but we managed by yelling!  I was really glad to hear her voice and she, of course, had thrown out her water!  Good girl!  I texted my son, my sister and friends who began to text back.  It was so much fun!

We left the VFW at 12:20 and I was home in my jammies at 12:30!  The following morning, the first of 2013, I got a call to come over in my jammies and share a huge country breakfast at Miss Ellie's :)  I ran over with an empty coffee cup as I'd forgotten to buy half and half!  

I rested all day yesterday and wondered how many calories I'd burned only to consume much more at breakfast!  Who cares?!  I had a great NYE and a wonderful New Year's Day.  I hope you did, too :)

Oh, and my January 2013 horoscope by Susan Miller predicts that I'll be busy this month with a new creative project that will keep me busy all year!  Yay!  My novel!  And, that I'll find love.  Who knows, right?  Apparently, my stars and planets have been in retrograde for years in the love department and this January, I have five important planets around my sun sign.  Girl, I could have told Susan that!

Peace and love to you,

Ellie

Christmas Memories

My sister and I on Christmas morning,1965

Happy Boxing Day to you! 

The day after Christmas is called Boxing Day in the UK because of all the people who go back into stores today with boxes of gifts to return!  I'm not going near a store today, I can tell you that!  I'm headed to the train station around two to catch my four o'clock train to West Virginia - home.

I will board that train with a huge smile on my face, new memories and a warm heart.  I was so blessed to have spent Christmas with my children, friends and family.  We had a wonderful Holiday and I hope you did, too.  We cooked way too much, ate way too much and shared in the cooking and clean up!  Cleaning up after dinner was just as much fun as cooking and eating with my family.  

Interesting to note that the women were cleaning up and putting food away and the men sat on the couch watching TV...what's wrong with this picture??  We kept them busy with three bags of trash that needed to go out and anything else we could think of to include them in the whole Christmas experience :)

I hate to leave my children in Northern Virginia and head home to West Virginia, but I will leave with beautiful memories, tons of pictures to edit and share.  And...I can't say I'm not glad the Holidays are over :)  I also get to see my furry babies tonight and that's great, too.  I've missed them and hope we have snow on the ground.  We had an inch in Virginia this morning, but it's now raining and slowly melting.  Glad I took photos early this morning!

We now head toward New Year's Eve and I don't have any plans.  I've already thought of an outfit if I get asked out, though :) You never know and must be prepared!  If I don't receive an invitation, I just might have a little cocktail party to ring in the New Year with my friends in town.  No reason to ring in the new year alone :)

Then, the editing begins BIG time.  It's time to prepare for the birth of this novel.  I have query letters to write and it's time to push forward in finding an agent and/or getting published out right...I know, I dream BIG!  Hey, I can visualize it, so it will happen, right?!  Right!

2013.  Bring it on :)

Have a beautiful day!

Peace and love,

Ellie



Holiday Love

Good morning!

First of all, I would like to thank my readers, friends and family for joining me on my blogging journey with Blogger this year!  I've enjoyed my time in my new blogging home and the 852 page views are awesome!  It has been quite a good year for my children and I and we are thankful!  I am thankful for you, as well :)

I wish you and yours a beautiful, safe Holiday season and all the best for the New Year!

My friend Ruth has invited me to a Christmas party tonight, the first of the Holiday season for me, and I'm excited.  I haven't seen the hosts for quite a while and they are a fun bunch - a young, fun bunch :)  I'm finally feeling the Christmas spirit!  I need to pack today, so that I'll be ready for my trip to Northern Virginia to see my kids...I might be a bit tired from the night before!

Tomorrow morning, I take the train to DC and will Metro to my daughter's house to help her get ready for our family Christmas dinner.  I'm excited to see my kids and family!  I'm not really ready, but will have a day to buy last minute gifts in the DC area.  If I can't find great gifts in the malls of Northern Virginia, they just don't exist :)

I leave my Pug, Ozzy and my kitten, Pierre in my pet sitter, Junior's good hands with a new ceramic heater for the kitchen which doesn't ever seem to be warm enough.  I will miss them!  I'm off to share the Holidays and make new memories with my human kids now and leave my furry kids behind :)

My thoughts and prayers are also with those who find themselves alone during this Holiday season, with those who are hurting, and with the Sandy Hook families who face a Christmas without their precious children and family members. I also pray for the military members who can't be with their families, the elderly and with those who are in hospitals, unable to get home.  I pray for those in hospice and in shelters.

God bless and keep you all.

Peace and Holiday love to you,

Ellie

Furry Blessings

Good morning to you!

You know how people say that having a pet can change your life?  It's true.  A pet can add much joy, love and comfort to you and only a pet can give you unconditional love. I am a huge animal lover and can't see myself living without pets.  

As a kid, we had a Papillion named Monster (he was feisty!) and a laid back Westie named Ricky who loved to dig much to my parent's dismay.  As a parent, I made sure my kids had lots of animals in the house.  Over the years, we eventually owned four Cocker Spaniels, four cats, a cheeky parakeet named Juju, many fish,  two small lizards and one turtle who loved my ex-husband.  I swear that turtle sat on his rock all day long and when my then-husband bent over the aquarium, that turtle did a jig.  I've never seen anything like it :)

All but one Cocker were rescues and so were two of our cats.  I even kept a small aquarium on our front porch so that my kids and their friends could keep minnows and pond critters from their adventures near the creek in the common area.  Our house was animal central and I didn't have a problem with it.  I felt, "what's one more?"

When my kids were in university, the last two Cockers passed away and when they moved away after college, our two Birman cats, Zach and Mia passed away.  I've been present at all their passings which is traumatic and sad.  I cried and cried to lose my precious babies.

Three years later, Ozzy, a three-year old Pug, adopted me at my local Petsmart and he's my bud!  I take Ozzy to the river and to visit friends who are pet friendly.  He's a great dog and when I wanted another Pug as I loved the breed so much, Lulu entered our lives.  A rescue Pug from South Carolina who grew up on the streets, literally.  She lasted a year with me.  The first dog I've ever "given up on".  Lulu was a sweet girl, but she was also a tough cookie.  Lulu didn't adjust to living with another dog, she wanted to be top dog and Ozzy wasn't having it.  My friend and her daughter now have Lulu and I'm happy that she found a good home. She is top dog at their house!

A year after moving to West Virginia, quite by accident, I met Pierre at our local Humane Society.  Love at first sight :)  He was ten weeks old when I brought him home and Ozzy accepted him immediately.  They are quite the pair and I love watching them play and horse around.  Our new family was complete and I also found a great pet sitter as I love to travel.  Life is good!

This morning, I'm looking into installing a surveillance camera in my kitchen.  Yes, you read right.  The peaceful home Ozzy and I shared is...less than peaceful.  Cats will rearrange your life, force you to rearrange furniture and knick knacks, and remind you to shut doors you previously left open!

I need to see what Pierre (kitten) and Ozzy (Pug) get into while I'm sleeping.  Well, I actually know what they get into while I'm sleeping because the evidence is usually strewn on the kitchen floor.  All over the kitchen floor.  I want to SEE how these capers happen.

Last week, I bought a large box of Rice Krispies because I was craving a big bowl of cereal and at five dollars a box, that's an expensive treat!  I had two bowls the night before and I left the box on the counter.  In the morning, the entire box of cereal was all over the kitchen floor!  This morning, I woke up to a brand new package of napkins, shredded all over the kitchen floor and Pierre has managed to figure out how to open the bottom drawer of my stove!  How does he do it?!

Ozzy never got into anything.  He never got into the trash, into shopping bags, my purse nor did I have to keep the toilet paper roll in a closed basket.  I could leave jewelry lying on my dresser, my placemats on the kitchen table and spare change in a bowl.  Not now.  Pierre is one busy kitten at night and his accomplice Ozzy is right behind him...when the object(s) reach the floor.  I can't leave my coffee or tea unmanned, don't dare have lit candles in the house, have removed objects I don't want broken and I've lost more pens and pencils than I can shake a stick at.  Batteries, Chap Sticks and lighters, too!  God forbid I should leave my laptop open...sheesh.

Pierre has been the impetus to redecorate my house for the Holidays.  Christmas cards are now taped to a mirror, I have no ornaments on my tree (only lights) and the dining table is sans Holiday tablecloth.  I wouldn't dream of wasting money on a Holiday bouquet or flower arrangement and poinsettias are poisonous for animals!  Did my other cats do these things or was I so busy with kids and other animals to notice?  Did I have more energy and less stuff?  Have I grown so stuck in my ways that I didn't notice?

The only change I've had to make with Ozzy since Pierre came to live with us is that the litter box now sits on my dryer and it's permanent...I'll let you figure that one out!

I'm constantly trying to stay one step ahead of Pierre, but when that kitten lays on my lap and purrs, I'm putty in his hands. When Ozzy joins us on the couch and snores lightly beside me, that's pure heaven.  When I need a hug, a kiss and someone to baby, they're right there with me.  What're ya gonna do?  Gotta love animals :)

Peace and love,
Ellie

Relax, It'll Happen

Hi all,

I depart tomorrow morning for Puerto Rico and I couldn't be happier.  This trip came up quickly. I jumped at the chance to see my family on the island when I saw the email from Travel Advisor that informed me about the $262.00 round trip ticket!  Done!  I called my friend D and she was up for a trip, so we booked it.

This week, I had a great week with my novel.  I'm at Chapter 23! I hadn't paid my cable and Internet bill on the 1st and when I thought about it...I thought, "well, let's see how much I get done with no major distractions.  Major work was done, wow.  I took what Julia Cameron, author of The Artist's Way, calls a major break.  I left the world behind.  So, I didn't pay my bill and boy, did I get a lot done!  I'm at chapter 22 with the editing. All good.  I should do this more often, I thought!

So, I planned on leaving my home in West Virginia on Amtrak #30, headed for Union Station in Washington, DC to spend the night with my friend D who is traveling to PR with me tomorrow morning.  I called Amtrak before I left the house and was informed about a 30 minute delay.  No problem. I kept calling and at 11 am, I boarded the train.  I'm headed to Puerto Rico tomorrow morning, I thought.  No big deal.  I love the train and the two hour journey.

Around Harpers Ferry, our train stopped.  Twenty minutes later, we were still stopped and no one knew why. I went in search of a coffee in the Cafe car and was informed that the freight train ahead of us had derailed.  The train behind that one (and in front of my train) called in an emergency.  So, we were delayed.  There's nothing as annoying as wanting to begin your vacation or journey and you can't!  But, I kept calm.

One, no one had been hurt in the derailment and two, I was seated next to a lovely young lady who, as it turns out, I had a lot in common with.  Well, actually...her mother and I could be twins.  Long time marriages, divorce, and her mother and I have made new lives for each other. It was funny to speak to a young woman who was saying the same things I've heard my kids say, "She's on Facebook all the time, she writes a blog, and she's tried Internet dating." :)  Yep, been there, done that!

We made the best of an annoying situation and before we knew it, we were moving. We never exchanged names or numbers as people often do, knowing full well that they'll never contact each other.  We enjoyed our time together and bid each other farewell, wishing each other a wonderful Holiday.  It's all good.

I love the randomness of life.  I love the people we meet as we're going on with the business of life.

I'll toast you with a rum punch tomorrow when I reach Puerto Rico!

Peace and love,
Ellie

I Laughed 'Til I Cried

Hi all,

I don't know much about the human brain nor how it works, but I believe that what we experience and think about in our waking life manifests itself in our dreams.

Have you ever woken up from a dream crying and/or laughing ?  I've experienced both and it happened again this morning.

My dream early this morning (isn't that when REM happens?) involved an old fishing buddy/friend.  In the dream, we were on a fishing trip and he was trying to get all romantic with me and I playfully pushed him away.  He had wanted to slow dance and when we started dancing, we fell through the wood floor and landed in a mud pit!  I laughed in my dream and when I woke up, I was laughing so hard, I had tears in my eyes!  I lay there laughing for about five minutes until my sides hurt. Laughter is the best medicine for what ails us :)

Here's why I had that dream:

Late last night, the very friend in my dream (who I haven't heard from in six months) sent me a photo via text of him proudly holding up a huge trout that didn't look too happy.  We've been friends for years and I secretly think he has a crush on me, but I would never  jeopardize our friendship (and he has a girlfriend) so, I've jokingly pushed away his friendly advances.

and,

After I received my friend's text, I watched a comedy with Meryl Streep, Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin (just before bed) entitled, "It's Complicated".  It was complicated!  Divorced ten years, Streep and Baldwin start an affair while he's married to someone else. See? It was all connected and led to my dream!

Our brains are so complicated that it boggles the mind. My dream was a composite of things I'd experienced and thought about before bed.  The falling through the wood floor part stumps me though.  I'd watched the newest episode of "Walking Dead" before the comedy and I don't think anyone fell through the floor (although a dozen zombies or so bit the dust last night) and it certainly isn't a comedy!  The falling through the floor into a mud pit did make me laugh, however.  I know what makes me laugh :)

I suppose I needed that laugh this morning after losing my manuscript edits yesterday that I'd been working on for two weeks straight.  It worked and so, onward and upward we go!

Peace and love,
Ellie

The Denutting of Pierre

Hi all,

My kitten Pierre will be under the knife in a few hours which I hate, but it's necessary.  My   pet sitter, Junior (75-year old Junior) calls it "denutting".  I laughed out loud when he said that to me, but I'm sure Pierre isn't laughing.  Denutted.  That Junior is a hoot :)

Pierre and I met at the Humane Society on the outskirts of my town and it was love at first sight.  Ozzy (my Pug) and I fell in love at a rescue event at Petsmart in Virginia nearly four years ago.  Do you get the idea that I can't go to rescues or shelters?  You'd be right and that's why I don't go on a regular basis!  I'd come home with puppies and kitties every single time.  It's very difficult for me to leave empty-handed.

Junior says I have the best dog and kitten in the world and I have to agree with him.  They're awesome furry children.  I told Junior that they're great because they were raised right :) They're well-loved, they get along great, and they give me unconditional love every day.  That's worth the price of admission as far as I'm concerned.  

I might have to juggle a purring kitten on my lap as I try to edit my manuscript or find several lines of "zzzzzzzzzzzzz" on the page when I return to the room, and I might have to take several breaks during the day to walk and play with Ozzy, but it's all worth it.  Watching them play and nap around me is very comforting and a lot of fun.  Ozzy welcomed Pierre with open paws and it's heart-warming to see them drinking from the same water bowl.  They don't have to as the kitten has his own food and water bowls, but Pierre loves his big brother and Ozzy is happy to share.

What writer doesn't need a warm lap and several breaks during the day to get away from the laptop?  My pets remind me to stop and smell the roses when I'm headed inside my head with my novel and they remind me to stand up and stretch my tired muscles from sitting at the laptop for hours on end.  Lord knows I need the exercise as I sit on my bum nearly all day long with this novel!

My kids live two hours from me and I can't imagine living in a house without pets. I would be too lonely.  Pierre and Ozzy don't talk much, but they're great company and even better listeners :)

Happy Saturday to you!
Peace and love,

Ellie

Am I Finished Yet?

Hi all,

Well, it's official.  I can't eat cheese, bread or rice.  Milk, either.  Actually, I can eat those things, but I suffer the consequences!  I've taken a one week, self-imposed food test this week, eating suspicious food items only to have an upset stomach, cramping and then, some in the evenings and early morning.  I had a bad night last night and am still harboring an upset stomach and a headache this morning.

This week, I tried three small slices of cheese pizza and gave the rest to my neighbor; garlic shrimp with white rice and wonton soup and trotted myself (no pun intended!) to my neighbor's house with the left-overs; and had a bowl of cereal with skim milk last night.  I was uncomfortable hours later.  My neighbor ate well this week!  Half and half with my coffee doesn't seem to bother me as much and I'm NOT giving up my cafe au lait or cream in my tea.  No way.

So.  Today, I go on a liquid fast to detox my body from all that nasty stuff that's making me feel ill and queasy.  I hope it works and maybe I'll lose a few pounds in the process.  That would be nice, too.  My life's run with cheese pizza, white rice and the occasional white bread is over.  I've tried and my body just can't deal with it anymore.

This morning, I've already tackled three more chapters of my manuscript and I'm satisfied with them.  It's amazing how many times I can read a chapter and STILL find things to change and improve upon.  When does it end?  When is a ms truly finished and ready?  Will I know when that times comes?  Or does someone else have to tell me?!

Much like painting, it's tough to know when you're finished.  In painting, there comes a time when I have to give it up and just say, "This is the best I can do" while knowing deep inside that there's always something I can tweak and improve. Drives me nuts.  Maybe it's helpful to have a friend who is brutally honest who can drag us away, saying, "Back away!  It's finished!  Leave it alone!"  Do we trust ourselves or someone else to make that decision for us?

Writing this novel has felt like a pregnancy and I'm in the 8th month now.  I can feel it.  I love this baby, love working with it, enjoy thinking and dreaming about holding that book in my hand...and yet, I'm getting tired of being pregnant :)  My internal feet are swelling, I'm gaining weight (true), I'm bloated, and I have gas!  Ha ha!

I enjoy the winter months for producing work.  It's a nice, quiet, cozy time of year and I predict...that this book will be finished by January 1st.  Yes, I do.  That is my self-imposed deadline and procrastinators like me need deadlines.

And like I experienced after childbirth, I'm sure I'll say, "That wasn't so bad, was it?  I think it's time to start thinking about another baby."  Smile.

So, on we go.

Happy Friday to you!
Peace and love,

Ellie

How NOT to Write a Novel

Hi Mama!  What?  I'm sorry, were you working here?  I was cold and this thing is so nice and toasty :)

The Writer's Life in Winter

Hi all,

Despite having the heat on and the small heater in my bedroom on HIGH, it was cold this morning!  I grabbed my old, gray cashmere robe with the holes in it (moths?), put on thick socks and my black yoga pants (I don't DO yoga), and slipped into my fake black Uggs before coming downstairs.  This is my favorite winter writing outfit.  It was even colder downstairs in the kitchen!  Wooeeee!

Note to self:  buy another space heater for the kitchen.

I let the Puglet out from the kitchen door and he turned back at me like I'd told him to walk the plank off a ship into freezing waters!  "Be a man, Ozzy.  Get out there and do your business!" I told him and had to shut the kitchen door or he would have run back inside.  Eventually, he sniffed around and did his business on my nearly frozen hydrangea bushes.  Nice.  I'll have to remember to wear gardening gloves next Spring.  I could hear him say, "There, happy now?"  He did look a little smug when he ran inside.

Winter is the perfect time of year to write if you tend to hibernate like me in the winter months.  There is no gardening to be done in my yard although I could put those bulbs in the ground that have been sitting in my gardening shed for a year already.  Nah.  Too cold already!  My grapevine doesn't get pruned until March, so I live indoors now.

I either write downstairs on the dining room table with the view of my garden or upstairs in my bedroom.  I can choose between my comfy, warm bed or the huge banker's desk that sits against the wall if I go upstairs.  Nice to have choices :)  All my writing books are in a bookcase in my bedroom, as well.  My dictionaries, Thesauraus, books on plot, character development, POV, the latest Writer's Digest, and then some. I make a pot of tea or coffee and I'm set for the day.

To be a writer means playing alone in your head for hours upon hours a day.  It's nuts really, so you may as well be comfortable, warm and happy going nuts.

I usually begin writing and editing downstairs and as the day progresses, I move upstairs because the TV is close to the dining room and I can easily switch it on out of habit.  Too many distractions with the History channel, the Food Network, Bravo TV, NatGeo, SyFy shows and I am addicted to the Housewives shows!  All of them.  I know, I know, don't ask!

Do you have a favorite place or time to write?  What's your favorite writing outfit?  Have a nice day :)

Peace and love,
Ellie

Thank you, Julia!

Hi all,

I had a very productive day yesterday with the manuscript despite worrying that my author blog was already too personal.  I've blogged since 2007 (on Thoughts.com) and was told on many occasions that my forte was being up close and personal.  I wasn't so sure I should be as personal on my new author blog, so late last night, I decided to take a little tour of other author's blogs before bed.

Many of the blogs I visited are personal in nature and some even add photos of their children, furry children and families.  These authors post a blog a day (which I'm used to doing) and it turns out, they treat their blogs like diaries or journals.  I can do that!  Now, you might not enjoy what I post, but that's another kettle of fish :)

Writing comes easy to me.  Words and ideas in a blog come out in stream of consciousness style and I rarely go back and edit what I've written (unlike my novel and short stories).  In addition to a love of writing, I think this comes from being a devotee from way, way back of Julia Cameron and her seminal book, "The Artist's Way".  

Per Cameron's advice, I dutifully wrote my Morning Pages in beautifully-bound journals in longhand for over ten years.  (I had special fountain pens in all colors for my journals.  There's just something magical about a fountain pen, especially a Mont Blanc fountain pen.)

My father's new wife gave me the book, "The Artist's Way" in 2000 as a Christmas present and I "did" the book alone for a solid year.  The next year, I invited ten women to join me once a month.  One group turned into three and ten years later, the second group is still meeting in Brussels, Belgium.  That makes me very happy!

Cameron taught me to write and push through writer's block, fear, distractions and the excuses.  I kept writing even if I started writing out a list of what I needed at the grocery store, my list of things to do and/or a scathing rant (very healing!).  Just keep writing, she encouraged me, and I trusted her.  Working with "The Artist's Way" was very cathartic and healing for me when I finished.  The experiences truly changed my life and I know that sounds dramatic, but it's true for me.

I love what Cameron says about journaling and truth (and I'm paraphrasing here) - start writing and keep writing anything that comes to mind.  Right smack in the middle of your three pages (or a bit later for me), you will find that your "truth" comes out.  That thing that has bugged you, kept you awake, that fear, the dread or the reason you're blocked, comes out.  As she says, you can't lie to yourself when you journal.  She's absolutely right.

When I returned to the US as a newly separated, single Mom to two college-age kids in 2006, my son introduced me to blogging.  Very soon afterward, journaling turned into blogging and I never looked back.  I blogged anonymously for four years and very soon, I was emailing with fellow bloggers on that site; ones that I had a lot in common with.  On occasion, I still wrote my Morning Pages in long-hand because I'm a Virgo and a stickler to being a purist when I can be :)  But, that soon fell by the wayside as I began to interact with fellow bloggers.  It opened a whole new world for me.

I went on to meet five bloggers who I count as very dear friends today and I keep in touch with all of them to include the women in my "The Artist's Way" groups.  Some of these women still live in Brussels and some returned to the US after I did.  These women have been my sounding boards, my shoulder to lean on and cry with, and we've taken turns being mentors and students for one another.  A creative group is so important for creative people!

Blogging as a writer/author, however, is a totally different beast, I've found. Authors review other author's books, there are contests for free books, blog tours, Holiday give-aways and ways to market your book.  So, I'm learning new things every day.

I highly recommend blogging and as I look back, it can change your life as it did mine.  Blogging kept me sane and writing during the time that I was working full-time and going to school part-time and didn't have the time or emotional energy to pull my manuscript out of the Belgian packing box.  Blogging was my daily exercise, my drug and helped me remain sane through my separation and divorce.  I found a wonderful support group of men and women through blogging around that period of my life.  Yep, I highly recommend it and if you know me, you know I've recommended it to you :)

Good luck to you and happy writing!

Peace and love,
Ellie

Three Steps Forward and Two Steps Back.

Hi all,

As the Amtrak train rounded the bend toward my town, I reached into my purse to pull out my keys.  No keys!  I double checked and then remembered - they were on my sister's kitchen table.  Oh well.  I knew Junior, my dog sitter, had a house key and I have a spare car key at home.  Disaster averted as Junior answered his cell phone; he was on his way to my house.

I'm always happy to get home after a weekend away.  My house and garden looked great and it was lovely to be in my comfy bed with a good book last night - mine!  The hard copy of my manuscript arrived while I was gone.  I'd already made the changes my editor suggested (they were awesome changes) last week on Track Changes and now, I held 365 pages of my novel.  How wonderful is that?

This week, I begin fleshing out the friendships in my novel and working on Point of View (POV) which I've found to be quite difficult!  My editor has recommended taking out the two male character's POV which I totally agree with.  My target audience - women.  I get that and it makes sense to me.  So, on we go :)

I had a nice time with my children and my sister this past weekend, celebrating our friend Carmen's 80th birthday.  Carmen's three children, their families and nearly all her grandchildren were in attendance to include two new great-grandchildren.  Carmen looked beautiful and her family did a wonderful job putting her party together.  I was happy for her and happy that my children joined me in celebrating the special day.

As I looked around the Clubhouse dining room, I was reminded that all of my mother's friends have lost their husbands - all widows.  I wondered if that still holds true, that women outlive men.  None of these women were smokers nor heavy drinkers.  My grandmother outlived my grandfather.  They were the heads and hearts of their families.  My grandmother was certainly the head of our family - the Matriarch.

What am I as the eldest daughter of my family?  Am I the matriarch?  Does that still exist in this day and age?  Maybe it does.  I suppose I felt like the matriarch when I was still married and financially able to help my children and my family after my mother and grandmother died.  When someone had a problem or issue, I was ready and able to assist, but now as a divorcee living on a budget and two hours from my children - not so much.  I guess I did feel like a matriarch in those days and was always happy to help; just didn't give it much thought until yesterday.

My children have graduated from college and are on their own.  My sister and her children are doing well and my half-sister's children are pretty much on their own, as well. My kids know that I would sell my car and house if they were in dire straits and, thank God, they are doing more than well at this time.

My kids used to listen to my advice, suggestions and gentle words when they were in high school, in college and for a few years afterward.  These days?  Not so much!  They roll their eyes, disagree with me and poke fun at me.  My "words of wisdom" (judging by their reactions and facial expressions) must seem old-fashioned, out-of-touch and cooky to them :)  I've kind of given up the generational or self-imposed title of matriarch.  As they moved forward in their lives, so did I but it felt strange, at times.

I guess I thought I was the matriarch by default because my mother and grandmother has passed on.  Unlike my mother, grandmother, Carmen and her girlfriends whose husbands passed on, I was divorced and didn't fare as well as I probably would have if I were a widow.  Just sayin' and I wish him well :)

None of these women entered the dating world at 50 after divorce and none of them worked past 50 because they didn't have to.  For the most part, women of my mother and grandmother's generations just settled into living alone as widows and living for their children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren.  Many of these women volunteered their time to favorite charities and their churches; they still do as I learned yesterday.

Do today's matriarchs date, live lives as single women and still take single's cruises?!  Do our children see us as matriarchs?  Do mine?  Is that word and title passe or non-existent?  I think my children would love for me to be a matriarch.  It's complicated...they don't like hearing about my dating life (non-existent at this time) and they'd love to see me married. I think my children secretly wish I would stay home and bake cookies like the old days when my world revolved around them.  By the same token, they wish I would get a life so that they can live theirs without my interference and two cents :)  It's a different generation.

My kids might not realize that I wish I could go back in time...but, it's NOT my reality at this time in my life.  It's not their fault - they were raised in a traditional, father works outside the home, mother stays home family.

So, I'm a 55 year old, single woman who still has dreams, goals and aspirations.  I have adult kids and I'm trying to figure out how I stay loyal to myself and parent adult kids IF we in fact, parent adult kids under 30!  I don't think we do.  I think my kids tolerate me and would pat my head like a good ol', loyal dog if they could :)

My youngest sister isn't the matriarch as she lives her life in MD and gets together with us on holidays and special occasions.  Is Carmen the matriarch of her family or is she just the oldest?  Why in the heck did I bother thinking that I was the matriarch, the family cheer leader, the wise old lady?  Delusional, right?  Am I more traditional than I thought?  Why did I think that being the head of a family was so damn important and why have I fought tooth and nail to keep my small family tight and close-knit?  No one else seems to be bothered by it.  We just get together when we can and go our separate ways afterward.  I've learned an important lesson this weekend.  And it's all good.

Well, it's no wonder I write fiction, for goodness sake!  I can be the matriarch in my novel, the heroine and the sage wise woman. As they say, I believe my debut novel is more of an auto-biographical than I thought.  I thought this blog would be about writing and my novel...and I guess it is.  These are the thoughts that come to mind as I edit.  Am I supposed to only write about writing?  Teach creative writing, give tips, and play the expert or is writing about life and what we've learned along the way WHILE we write?  I'm not really sure.

I just hate letting people down, but time and life lately have shown me that I'm not letting anyone down.  I was standing in my own way and didn't realize it.  I was hanging onto a role that no one wants me to play...HUGE light bulb moment here.  I'm okay with that now, but God help them if they want me to revert back.  You can't have your cake and eat it, too :)

Peace and love,
Ellie

We All Have a Book to Write.

Hi all,

I'm a person who believes that when you put your mind to something, a dream, a goal or a challenge, you can do it.  I also believe that when you decide what you want in your life, the Universe conspires to facilitate the process and the path.  

Yeah, that sounds like New Age lingo, doesn't it?  Well, I believe it because I've experienced it.  Any time I've decided to pursue a dream and reach a goal, I've known full-well that the prize wasn't going to be handed to me on a silver platter.  Dreams and goals require research, thought, soul searching, lots of hard work and at times, sacrifice.  As soon as I've done the necessary legwork, it's amazing...people and complete strangers have come out the wings and shadows to either walk beside me, mentor and assist me.

When I wrote a tribute to my Puerto Rican grandmother for her 90th birthday, I sent it to my female relatives.  The tribute was well-received which pleased me and my grandmother loved it.  I was one of those kids who sat Meme's feet, listening intently to her stories of growing up poor in the Playa de Ponce in Puerto Rico, marrying well and the struggles and challenges of being a woman/mother in the early 1900's.  My mother, Mercedes, knew all the stories and when we'd return from our summers on the island, she'd regale my sister Elaine and I with those stories we loved.

I showed my then-husband the tribute to my grandmother and he encouraged me to write an outline to see if I had "a book in there".  In fifteen minutes, I had an outline.  He said to me, "You've got a book to write."  He was right.  Right then and there, I sat at the computer and in six months, I'd written a 326 page novel.  With two kids at home and a husband/household to manage :) I finished it.  I'd always journaled, but a novel?  The idea never crossed my mind before.  I've always joked that the spirits helped me write this novel...and I'm not so sure that isn't true.

Through my research for my debut novel, I've met two professors of women's studies from various US universies in Washington, DC; I traveled to Puerto Rico and the Dominican Republic interviewing women; and I traveled to Cacao in the mountains of Puerto Rico where my grandparents owned a farm with my cousin, Josefina. A stroll down Memory Lane for us.  I met two female Puerto Rican authors who I'm still friends with.

Synchronicity after synchronicity has occurred during my writing path and I am just amazed.  I am passionate about the arts and I love my story.  Fast forward six years and I'm still blogging, Tweeting, still meeting and communicating with latinas/latinos and hispanics from around the world.  I'm new to social media and I'm learning so much.  At times, I feel as if I've opened Pandora's Box with this novel and the marketing involved before, during and after publication!  To me, the Internet is mind-boggling and mind-blowing place that I'm learning to navigate and I'm not too proud to say I don't know and I'm always open for advice, suggestions, and comments!

Let me tell you, it takes a village to write a book!  We all have a book in us.  If you've felt the need to write and have dreamed of writing, do it!  Don't wait, my friend.  Jump in there and just start writing.  Sit your butt down and write.  I'm rooting for ya :)

Peace and love,
Ellie

Making Myself Comfortable on Blogger!

Hello!

I'm not a new blogger, not by a long shot!  I blogged as Ellie2008 on Thoughts.com since October 2007 (until yesterday) and had a brief foray as PracticalSpirituality365 for six months on the same site.  Thoughts.com is going through some major changes, so I moved on and I'm happy in my new home!

My Ellie2008 blog was primarily about the adventures and misadventures I experienced as a divorced woman in her 50's who is thrown into the dating scene after 27 years as a wife and at-home Mom.  My real life stories will make you laugh your ass off, might break your heart and cause you to make your husband breakfast in bed so that you won't be a single woman in your 50's!  Just kidding, of course!  I love being single :)

I also wrote some blogs in Spanish because I'm Puerto Rican born.  A proud Boricua from Ponce, Puerto Rico!  I was educated in the US, Puerto Rico and Europe.  I've lived in six European countries and am happy to be back on the US with my two gorgeous children, Heather and Matthew.

The Practicalspirituality365 blog was about lessons and things I'd learned along my path which is my life.  I started this blog as a way to give back for all the blessings in my life and it gave me much peace to write these blogs.

These two blogs are in my past, but believe me, the dating stories WILL be put to good use in my next novel.  Of course, a comedy!  You can't make that shit up :)

So, why am I here today, introducing myself to you?

I finished my first novel, "A Decent Woman" and I can't 'wait for you to read it!  My novel is an historical novel set in 1900 Playa de Ponce, Puerto Rico about the life-long friendship of Dona Ana, the Afro-Cuban born midwife and Leila, the young society wife whose family was poor before she married well; and the difficulties that society puts on these two women who strive and fight to remain friends.

My fabulous and generous editor Deborah has sent her editorial letter and edits to me this week and I'm very encouraged!  I want to begin this blog the night before I open those Track Changes!

I'm excited to share my writing life with you.  I'll be happy to share my lessons, experiences, mistakes and joys along the way to seeing "A Decent Woman" published.  And, I WILL be published :)  I've visualized it, dreamed it and tasted it...

I'm the new girl on the block and I'm happy to meet you!

Peace and love,

Ellie